The Police Harassment edition of Community Policing

The Police Harassment edition of Community Policing

http://tinyurl.com/ybflvap http://twitpic.com/u7etr http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/post/290554431/the-police-harassment-edition-of-community

Click here for a larger image: http://twitpic.com/u7etr or here: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/post/290554431/the-police-harassment-edition-of-community

(I received this in an e-mail from a reliable source. Yet, nevertheless, I did go about attempting to verify it in anyway. If the e-mail is not real, then it needs to be…)

Shhh...Special Insider Stuff.

Police Harassment

Recently, the Chula Vista Police Department ran an e-mail forum (a question and answer exchange) with the topic being, "Community Policing."

One of the civilian email participants posed the following question, "I would like to know how it is possible for police officers to continually harass people and get away with it?"

From the "other side" (the law enforcement side) Sgt. Bennett, obviously a cop with a sense of humor replied:

"First of all, let me tell you this...it's not easy. In Chula Vista, we average one cop for every 600 people. Only about 60% of those cops are on general duty (or what you might refer to as "patrol") where we do most of our harassing.

The rest are in non-harassing departments that do not allow them contact with the day to day innocents. And at any given moment, only one-fifth of the 60% patrollers are on duty and available for harassing people while the rest are off duty. So roughly, one cop is responsible for harassing about 5,000 residents.

When you toss in the commercial business, and tourist locations that attract people from other areas, sometimes you have a situation where a single cop is responsible for harassing 10,000 or more people a day.

Now, your average ten-hour shift runs 36,000 seconds long. This gives a cop one second to harass a person, and then only three-fourths of a second to eat a donut AND then find a new person to harass. This is not an easy task. To be honest, most cops are not up to this challenge day in and day out. It is just too tiring. What we do is utilize some tools to help us narrow down those people which we can realistically harass.

The tools available to us are as follows:

PHONE: ... People will call us up and point out things that cause us to focus on a person for special harassment. "My neighbor is beating his wife" is a code phrase used often. This means we'll come out and give somebody some special harassment.

Another popular one is, "There's a guy breaking into a house." The harassment team is then put into action.

CARS: ... We have special cops assigned to harass people who drive. They like to harass the drivers of fast cars, cars with no insurance or no driver's licenses and the like. It's lots of fun when you pick them out of traffic for nothing more obvious than running a red light. Sometimes you get to really heap the harassment on when you find they have drugs in the car, they are drunk, or have an outstanding warrant on file.

RUNNERS: ... Some people take off running just at the sight of a police officer. Nothing is quite as satisfying as running after them like a beagle on the scent of a bunny. When you catch them you can harass them for hours.

STATUTES: ... When we don't have PHONES or CARS and have nothing better to do, there are actually books that give us ideas for reasons to harass folks. They are called "Statutes"; Criminal Codes, Motor Vehicle Codes, etc... They all spell out all sorts of things for which you can really mess with people.

After you read the statute, you can just drive around for awhile until you find someone violating one of these listed offenses and harass them. Just last week I saw a guy trying to steal a car. Well, there's this book we have that says that's not allowed. That meant I got permission to harass this guy. It is a really cool system that we have set up, and it works pretty well.

We seem to have a never-ending supply of folks to harass. And we get away with it. Why? Because for the good citizens who pay the tab, we try to keep the streets safe for them, and they pay us to "harass" some people.

Next time you are in my town, give me the old "single finger wave." That's another one of those codes. It means, "You can harass me. "It's one of our favorites..

20091229 sdosm The Police Harassment portion of Community Policing Humor, Law Order, Law Order Community Policing, Law Order Humor

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/12/police-harassment-edition-of-community.html http://tinyurl.com/ybflvap http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/post/290554431/the-police-harassment-edition-of-community

*****

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*****

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Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

Local University to ban eating ice cream on campus

A leading “Local University” will be an ice cream-free campus, according to recent widely circulated media reports. (Click here for a larger image: http://twitpic.com/plzlw )

November 14, 2009 by Kant BeTrue New Bedford Herald http://tinyurl.com/yck8ubq

The policy was announced last Wednesday by university officials as they sipped bottled water and munched on simulated fiber-bars, Manhattan style fish assholes and giant curried water bugs. (Click here for a larger image of the “Red Curry Giant Water Bugs: http://twitpic.com/plzzd )

University officials expressed pride at becoming “Maryland's first four-year college to ban an activity once as commonplace as lounging on the quad,” according to one local newspaper.

The sloth-like “lounging in the quad” is also under consideration to be banned. “We want a healthy – and all-conforming campus, that is obedient and health-conscious,” said officials.

“The reason for the policy, which goes into effect in August, is simple, administrators said: They want to reduce health risks from (eating ice cream) and secondhand exposure to (obese students.”)

"I don't try to guide people in how they live their lives, but I am going to protect the campus so it's clean and pleasant for as many people as possible," said the Local University President, Dr. Knowles Jerry-Ben, known affectionately on campus as “Dr. Kno,” who cited a study by The Center for Science in the Public Interest.

Eating ice cream is decadent, indulgent, and delicious, however, the consumer watchdog group is warning many ice cream treats are “coronaries in cones.” Many top brands contain huge amounts of calories and saturated fats said CSPI.

According to one publication, which reported upon the study, “the researchers were astounded at the calories and saturated fat content in a single cone of many products sold by companies like Baskin-Robbins, Ben & Jerry's and Haagen-Dazs.”

Local University has concurrently announced that all products manufactured by Baskin-Robbins, Ben & Jerry's and Haagen-Dazs are not only banned on campus, but also prohibited within a ten-mile radius of the university campus.

Also, all local rallies and celebrations of National Ice Cream Day, usually held every year on July 15, are also now banned. Defiant demonstrators will be dealt with sternly, warned one official as he manically munched on the cardboard wrapper of a simulated fiber-bar.

When asked to comment on a Frederick News-Post article from 2007 that noted “In 1984, President Reagan designated National Ice Cream Day and declared July to be National Ice Cream Month,” one university official belched that President Ronald Reagan and any reference to the former president or his words or “utterances” is now deemed “hate-speech” and also banned on campus.

The news account had cited that “Reagan recognized ice cream as a fun and nutritious food enjoyed by 90 percent of the nation's population, according to the website for the International Dairy Foods Association.

One university official reminded the audience that the International Dairy Foods Association – the IDFA - is now on the Obama administration’s terrorist watch list for propagandizing that “The average amount of ice cream consumed in the United States on any given day in July is 5.3 million gallons.”

The inquiring reporter was immediately – and forcibly - removed from the news conference in handcuffs for asking questions considered seditious in tenor and rebellious in nature.

As the reporter, B. P. Ward of the Potomac Publishing Co., was dragged from the room, he shouted, “George Washington spent $200 on ice cream in the summer of 1790 – that’s a lot of money for back then.”

To which several university officials responded that any reference to President Washington is also seditious… and now banned.

Meanwhile, a published account noted that “Everyone knows that ice cream isn’t a health food, acknowledges the U.S.-based food sleuths famed for blowing the whistle on movie theatre popcorn and MSG in Chinese takeout,” which are also already banned from the campus.

The published account on the perils of ice cream noted, “A CSPI study released Wednesday found a regular scoop of premium ice cream provides 250 to 350 calories and half a day's worth of artery clogging saturated fat.

“‘That's twice what you'd get in a supermarket ice cream like Bryers,’ nutritionist Jayne Hurley told a Washington press conference.

“It can get worse. The food police say a large vanilla shake from Baskin-Robbins has more than 1,000 calories and 32 grams of saturated fat. That's like eating three McDonald's Quarter Pounders.”

All McDonald’s products have been banned from the university campus for some time, noted university officials.

“Hurley even had a warning about empty cones.

“‘This empty chocolate dipped waffle cone from Ben & Jerry's is the equivalent to a half pound rack of baby backribs…”

Waffles, baby backribs and all meat are also banned from the campus, university officials said with noticeable pride, while spitting-out giant water bug shells.

(Click here for a larger image of the Manhattan style fish: http://twitpic.com/pm08r )

Recently ABC News Medical Unit reported that “While the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention consistently report that meat is the number one cause of foodborne illness, they are not the only foods to be wary of.

“A new report from the Center for Science in the Public Interest found that a number of food poisoning cases are caused by some unexpected foods, including leafy greens, potatoes, and ice cream.”

Local University officials said that a ban on leafy greens and potatoes is also under consideration, which cited that, the “CSPI reported that leafy greens, including spinach, lettuce, and cabbage, were responsible for 363 outbreaks between 1990 and 2006 and caused 13,568 cases of illness.”

Eating hamburgers and all meat products, waffles, ice cream, popcorn, and Chinese food is “already banned in campus buildings at (Local University,) but under the new rules, it will be off-limits on the grounds: on sidewalks, in garages and parking lots, and even outside the bar … at the local bistro.”

Local University “joins a rapidly growing list of U.S. colleges - at least 365, according to the (American Say No to Ice Cream Rights Foundation) - that have banned (eating ice cream) on campus.”

According to a local publication: “Last year, Montgomery College became the first Maryland institution of higher education to take the leap. Harford, Frederick, and Carroll community colleges have followed suit. Pennsylvania's university system has banned (eating ice cream) on all of its campuses.”

Dr. Kno “said a survey found that a very small percentage of students and faculty (eat ice cream) and that those who do, (eat ice cream) less frequently than they did in the past. The policy encountered some opposition from student leaders.”

However, all opposition, dialogue, and discussion of university policies have long been banned on campus, following recent successful attempts at banning any opposition to the Ruling Party, on both the state and national level.

Some students “wondered if the university will be able to enforce the rule, noting that a current ban on (eating ice cream) within 30 feet of school buildings is only loosely followed.”

Directing their attention to the 30-foot rule, university officials deny that students have been beaten for violating the rules; however, a small number of students were imprisoned last year for eating ice cream.

University officials, speaking on the condition of animosity, said, that the arrests and incarcerations will continue until the mood and moral of the campus improves and conformity abounds.

“Students and staff members who violate the rules will face fines and sanctions. Visitors who” eat ice cream “may be barred from future access to the 328-acre campus,” and sent to a fat-farm for re-education…

“Some students said the ban on (ice cream) will improve campus.”

“By not having eating ice cream on campus, kids will stop eating ice cream,” said a senior, “can world peace be too far away as a result?”

-30 ½ -

Kant Betrue, a Carthaginian with a Doctorate in Modern Anxiety and a minor in ennui; whose family settled in Westminster after the Third Punic War, has been with the New Bedford Herald since the 1960s (he can’t remember exactly when in the 1960s…). A Pulverized Prize winner for journalism, he writes about issues ranging from the international syntactic semiotic economics to avatars of hyper-theoretical exploding toilets.

~~~~~

Colleges Universities, Colleges Universities Campus Politics, Dayhoff Art, Dayhoff literature of the absurd, Food, Humor, Medicine Health tobacco smoking, Politically Correct, This is nuts

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/11/local-university-to-ban-eating-ice.html http://tinyurl.com/yck8ubq

[20091006 icecream_poison] http://twitpic.com/plzlw
[20080224_waterbugredcurry] http://twitpic.com/plzzd
[20080224_fishassholes] http://twitpic.com/pm08r

Local University to ban eating ice cream on campus #art #PC http://tinyurl.com/yck8ubq http://twitpic.com/plzlw

Click here for a larger image of poison-labeled ice cream art: http://twitpic.com/plzlw

Red curried giant water bugs at university to ban eating ice cream on campus http://tinyurl.com/yck8ubq http://twitpic.com/plzzd

Click here for a larger image of the “Red Curry Giant Water Bugs: http://twitpic.com/plzzd

Manhattan style fish %#&holes at university to ban eating ice cream on campus http://tinyurl.com/yck8ubq http://twitpic.com/pm08r

Click here for a larger image of the Manhattan style fish: http://twitpic.com/pm08r

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/

*****

Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

Punctuation is Powerful

Punctuation is Powerful

Click here for a larger image: http://twitpic.com/l8bjs

“A woman: without her, man is nothing.”

Source: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/post/210808578/lucyd-dreams-via-sabino (No. OF NOTES: 533)

20091011 sdosm Punctuation is Powerful

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/10/punctuation-is-powerful.html http://tinyurl.com/yzxnnep

http://twitpic.com/l8bjs Punctuation is Powerful - “A woman: without her, man is nothing.” http://tinyurl.com/yzxnnep

Art Library Writing grammar, Humor, Men and women, Women

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/

*****

Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced...

Click here for a larger image: http://twitpic.com/l86o7

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your friends… If they seem Okay, then you’re the one.

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/10/one-out-of-four-people-in-this-country.html http://tinyurl.com/ykj5d3b

Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff

Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff

http://twitpic.com/l86o7 One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced http://tinyurl.com/ykj5d3b

http://twitpic.com/l86o7 1 out of 4 people n this country is mentally unbalanced Think of your friends If they seem Ok then youre the 1

20091007 one out of four mentally unbal

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/

*****

Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

Alaska Daily News: Julia O’Malley Hey Truck Dude, some things are best left in the garage

Hey Truck Dude, some things are best left in the garage

SEPTEMBER 27, 2009 http://community.adn.com/adn/node/143778

Dear Truck Dude,

You were the one on 15th Avenue about two weeks ago on a Friday. I pulled up behind you around Karluk Street. I had a headache. You had plastic man parts hanging from your tow hitch.

It might not have bothered me, as I have seen this kind of thing before, but it wasn't just you, it was also the dude next to you. And so I was trapped, staring into a vortex of swinging truck junk until the light changed.

My aching brain filled with one alarming thought: Is this going to be a trend now?

I mentioned your bumper ornament to a coworker a few days later. He said, "Oh, you mean TruckNutz." And so I Googled. It was a trend. The Nutz, which are widely available online, became a big thing last year during the presidential election after someone suggested Barack Obama get some so he could better relate to rural America. And a few states moved to ban them from the roads. They were kind of 2008, but like every other thing that becomes a thing Outside, it appeared they were catching on here 2000-late.

read more »

Anchorage Alaska Daily News columnist Julia O’Malley http://tinyurl.com/ya472rd

Click here for a larger image: http://twitpic.com/jj0ey

http://kevindayhoffart.blogspot.com/2009/09/anchorage-alaska-daily-news-columnist.html http://tinyurl.com/ya472rd

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/

*****

Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

I had a great time at the McDaniel Founders’ Dinner this evening

I had a great time at the McDaniel Founders’ Dinner this evening

I had a great time at the McDaniel Founders’ Dinner this evening. The event was superbly organized and there were about 360 great folks who attended.

20090926 mcd kitty

*****

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Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/

My http://www.explorecarroll.com/ columns appear in the copy of the Baltimore Sunday Sun that is distributed in Carroll County: https://subscribe.baltsun.com/Circulation/

News Reporter eaten alive

News Reporter eaten alive

July 31, 2009

Hat Tip: Gawker A Decade of Truth From the Weekly World News: via my blog at http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/ - or rather Jamie Kelly's blog at: jamiek

(Click here for a larger image)

Caption contest: New Reporter eaten alive by 80-foot Dinosaur.

I can immediately come up with several captions, such as – oh, well, ah, nevermind.

How about you? Any ideas as to a caption for this?

20090731 sdosm fb twitpic News Reporter eaten alive

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/07/news-reporter-eaten-alive.html http://tinyurl.com/kwyt9q

http://twitpic.com/cac9j Caption contest: News Reporter eaten alive http://tinyurl.com/kwyt9q

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/ YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/kevindayhoff Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1040426835 Kevin Dayhoff Banana Stems: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/ Blip.fm: http://blip.fm/kevindayhoff_soundtrack

Kevin Dayhoff: http://www.westgov.net/ Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Squirrel underpants

Squirrel underpants

Sunday, July 19, 2009

I found these at the Grandy Greenhouse and Farm Market in Grandy, NC, as one approaches the Outer Banks.

The number of practical applications for such a product are only limited by an avid imagination…

Click here to see a larger image.

http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/07/squirrel-underpants.html

http://twitpic.com/b1ec7 Squirrel underpants - I found these at the Grandy Greenhouse and Farm Market in Grandy, NC http://tinyurl.com/l8nvv7

20090719 FB sdosm twitpic Squirrel underpants

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/ YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/kevindayhoff Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1040426835 Kevin Dayhoff Banana Stems: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/ Blip.fm: http://blip.fm/kevindayhoff_soundtrack

Kevin Dayhoff: http://www.westgov.net/ Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

A message from your local fire department

A message from your local fire department

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_zzq8LPhdQ



20080619 sdosm A message from your local fire department

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/ YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/kevindayhoff Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1040426835 Kevin Dayhoff Banana Stems: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/ Blip.fm: http://blip.fm/kevindayhoff_soundtrack

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Hideous Man-Beast Washes Up On Shore Of Municipal Pool

Hideous Man-Beast Washes Up On Shore Of Municipal Pool

July 10, 2009 Issue 45•28

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/hideous_man_beast_washes_up_on

SEWARD, NE—Responding to complaints about an awful stench, local lifeguard Matt Frieze, 26, discovered what appeared to be the bloated body of a repulsive man-beast that had mysteriously washed up on the shore of the Dowding Municipal Pool Monday.

Enlarge Image

Onlookers were horrified at the sight of the massive, possibly amphibious monster

Frieze, who found the unidentified monstrosity sprawled out on the concrete at approximately 2:30 p.m., said he attempted to inspect the bizarre creature but was repelled by the sight of the putrid mass of flesh and hair.

"I've never seen anything like it before," said Frieze, adding that he first assumed it was just a pile of rotting sewage until he noticed its lower extremities were partially covered by what appeared to be a denim garment. "It looked like some kind of decomposing manatee with these horrible teeth and a face like…."

"Oh my God, I think I'm going to be sick," Frieze added.

Read the entire article here: http://www.theonion.com/content/news/hideous_man_beast_washes_up_on

*****

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff's The New Bedford Herald: http://kbetrue.livejournal.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Blip.fm: http://blip.fm/kevindayhoff_soundtrack Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/kevindayhoff Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1040426835 Kevin Dayhoff Banana Stems: http://kevindayhoff.tumblr.com/

Kevin Dayhoff: http://www.westgov.net/ Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

Pickle Peril

Pickle Peril

Few people realize the peril of the deadly pickle. Consider:

99.9% of all folks who die of a heart attack have eaten pickles;
-
99.7% of all those involved in air, auto, boat and bike accidents ate pickles in the preceding 21 days;
-
nearly all sick people have eaten pickles;
-
among all people born in 1870, who later ate pickles, there has been nearly 100% mortality.
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We simply must do something about this deadly scourge. Write your congress member today. Please tell him or her that enough is enough! Outlaw pickles today! Or at least place a seven-day waiting period on the purchase and possession of a pickle for domestic consumption. It is the least that we can do! Pickle peril must stop now! It must stop with us! It is our civic, human, ethical and moral responsibility.

20011123 Pickle Peril

Kevin Dayhoff: http://www.westgov.net/ Westminster Maryland Online http://www.westminstermarylandonline.net/ http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

UroClub New Commercial

UroClub New Commercial

Retrieved June 29, 2009

Hat Tip: R2

Same as original commercial, EXCEPT the 2nd UroClub at half price offer is over. Email us: info@uroclub.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwU8n4AOQl0



20090629 SDOSM UroClub New Commercial

Kevin Dayhoff: www.westgov.net Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

City Council's Attorney Found Asleep In Trash Can

City Council's Attorney Found Asleep In Trash Can June 19, 2009

Police: No Charges Will Be Filed

JEFFERSONVILLE, Ind. -- A southern Indiana lawyer said he's embarrassed and has apologized for being found asleep headfirst in neighbor's trash can after a night of drinking.

More: City Council's Attorney Found Asleep In Trash Can

20090619 City Councils Attorney Found Asleep In Trash Can

http://www.theindychannel.com/news/19799813/detail.html

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: www.kevindayhoff.net Kevin Dayhoff Art: www.kevindayhoffart.com Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: www.westgov.net

Duct tape making the world a prettier place

Duct tape: making the world a prettier place

Hat Tip: N3KTX – who reports:

DUCT TAPE USE #317

I have to tell you that I have never seen a better use for duct tape in my life.

Makes you want to require everyone to carry a roll for emergencies.

20090608 SDOSM Duct tape making the world a prettier place
20090608_Ducttapemakingtheworldpretty.jpg

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoffart.com/ Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/kevindayhoff Twitpic: http://twitpic.com/photos/kevindayhoff YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/kevindayhoff Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1040426835

Defense chief praises soldier in pink boxers

Defense chief praises soldier in pink boxers

GI jumped into action with flip-flops, too, after surprise Taliban attack

AP Fri., May 22, 2009

Photo by David Guttenfelder / AP: Zachery Boyd, in pink boxers, was routed from his sleep on May 11 by Taliban fire on a base in the Korengal Valley of Afghanistan's Kunar Province. With him are Cecil Montgomery of Many, La., far right; and Jordan Custer of Spokane, Wash.

WASHINGTON - Defense Secretary Robert Gates says American soldiers have more than their military might and training on their side in the war in Afghanistan. Some have pink underwear.

Gates told an audience in New York about Specialist Zachary Boyd, routed from sleep by enemy fire on his post in eastern Afghanistan.

"He immediately grabbed his rifle and rushed into a defensive position clad in his helmet, body armor, and pink boxer shorts that said 'I Love New York,'" Gates said Thursday night.

[…]

"Any soldier who goes into battle against the Taliban in pink boxers and flip-flops has a special kind of courage," Gates said, adding that Boyd may have hit on a new kind of psychological warfare. "I can only wonder about the impact on the Taliban.

[…]

Read the entire story here: Defense chief praises soldier in pink boxers

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30887233/?GT1=43001

20090524 DEFSEC praise soldier in pink shorts

Related:

U.S. defense chief lauds soldier in pink boxers

Gates: Solider in Pink Boxers Has "Special Kind of Courage"

Soldier Battles Taliban in Pink Undies

Soldier Pink Boxer Picture Draws Attention

Photo of US soldier in pink boxers turns iconic

View related photos

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoff.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/

Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

An Engineer's Guide to Cats

An Engineer's Guide to Cats

Two professional engineers illustrate the proper care and practical benefits of cats. None of the cats, humans, or engineers were mistreated in the making of this film. They were however, slightly annoyed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHXBL6bzAR4



I lost it at the cat-yodeling segment.

20090523 SDOSM An Engineers Guide to Cats

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoff.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/

Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

It was a perfect day, but the interview did not go well.

It was a perfect day, but the interview did not go well.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

While I was in Princeton New Jersey recently, I found myself walking along Nassau Street across from Princeton University.

It was a beautiful spring day. It was a perfect day - - or as Vivian Laxton would say, “C'est un jour parfait à donner des sédatifs.” (http://tinyurl.com/oh72eo)

The sidewalk was packed with all sorts of interesting folks; so, I thought that I would gather some views on contemporary events from the person in the street.

Hey, these things always go well when Mike Schuh does them.

Well, my experience was not so good.

She had nothing to say.

I can’t imagine what went wrong. I talked at great length about fashion, sports, life in a college town.

I even sang to her: “Oh it’s such a perfect day, I’m glad I spent it with you. Oh such a perfect day, You just keep me hanging on, You just keep me hanging on.

“Just a perfect day, Problems all left alone, Weekenders on our own. It’s such fun.

“Just a perfect day, You made me forget myself. I thought I was someone else, Someone good.” (http://tinyurl.com/r43u7h)

In return, I got, like, nothing.

Zip. (And, I might add, it was at this point, that my wife did not know me.)

Maybe I need to get some pointers from Bryan Sears or Clifford Cumber.

Maybe I need to grow a beard like Cumber. Sears would’ve nailed it.

I did get some funny looks from some passers-by.

A Mrs. Owl photo from May 16, 2009. 20090516 The Interview Princeton

http://kevindayhoffart.blogspot.com/2008/04/20080403-perfect-day-by-lou-reed-with.html

http://kevindayhoffart.blogspot.com/2008/06/20080607-c-un-jour-parfait-donner-des.html

20090516 The Interview

Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: www.kevindayhoff.net http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Art: www.kevindayhoff.com
Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: www.westgov.net

Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

A.A.A.D.D.

AAADD

I got this earlier today in an e-mail. It made me laugh. I could relate.

Hat Tip: Karen Scott and Mrs. Owl

KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!!

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table,
Put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
And notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back
On the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think,
Since I'm going to be near the mailbox
When I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table,
And see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
So I go inside the house to my desk where
I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking

I'm going to look for my checks,
But first I need to push the Pepsi aside
So that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm,
And I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,
A vase of flowers on the counter
Catches my eye--they need water.

I put the Pepsi on the counter and
Discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk,
But first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,
Fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote,
But I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
So I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
But first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers,
But quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table,
Get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to
Remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
The car isn't washed
The bills aren't paid
There is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
The flowers don't have enough water,
There is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
And I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,
And I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem,
And I'll try to get some help for it,
But first I'll check my e-mail...

Do me a favor.
Forward this message to everyone you know,
Because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!

20090505 SDOSM A.A.A.D.D.
Kevin Dayhoff Soundtrack: http://www.kevindayhoff.net/ http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Art: http://www.kevindayhoff.com/
Kevin Dayhoff Westminster: http://www.westgov.net/

A message from your local fire department

A message from your local fire department

April 16, 2009 - June 19, 2008

Mrs. Owl and I, Bob Ruby and Robin Stansbury – and the Westminster Fire Department have scheduled several fire prevention events in the recent past and more are scheduled for the near future…

And I recently wrote a column on “Recalling the devastating Westminster fire of 1906 By Kevin E. Dayhoff,” (Recalling the devastating Westminster fire of 1906 By Kevin E. Dayhoff Other recent columns by Kevin Dayhoff)

… In which I noted: “Fire safety remains a serious concern for out community even today. Just last Saturday, my wife, Miss Caroline, Westminster firefighter Bob Ruby and I staffed a fire prevention and safety booth at the William Winchester Elementary School Spring Carnival.

It is never too early to start teaching your children fire safety. As history shows us -- it's everyone's concern and it can be a matter of life and death.”

For the upcoming fire prevention events at some of the local schools, what do you think of showing the video below?

I mean, it would get their attention – and probably would not be forgotten quickly… Well, take a look and tell me what ya think?

Fire is serious business

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_zzq8LPhdQ



http://kevindayhoff.blogspot.com/2009/04/recalling-devastating-westminster-fire.html
20080619 FB SDOSM A message from your local fire department
20080619 20040500 Fire is serious business

Kevin Dayhoff: www.westgov.net Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/

The Fox Cardinal

The Fox Cardinal

April 15, 2009

Looked out into my backyard Wednesday afternoon and look at what I found.

Don’t believe me? All right, I found the image here:

Enjoy.

20090416 The Fox Cardinal
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/80606497/

Kevin Dayhoff Art: www.kevindayhoff.com (http://kevindayhoffart.blogspot.com/)

Kevin Dayhoff: www.westgov.net Westminster Maryland Online www.westminstermarylandonline.net http://kevindayhoffwestgov-net.blogspot.com/